Today I spent some time writing a blog entry targeted at those starting new careers. The entry is at a new blog (which is still under wraps), and it made me reflect on milestone that I crossed when cutting my teeth in management consulting and during business school.
The milestone is this: getting to a point where you are comfortable arguing with your boss.
This is not something that folks with Asian backgrounds (like myself) are culturally used to. Respect for elders and authority are something that is at the essence of these cultures, but some aspects of this culture breed overly passive behavior. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that arguing is disrespectful. Nor I’m a saying that it is OK to be disrespectful to elders and authority. What I am saying, is that when approached the right way and within cultural guidelines, when someone gets to a point that they are comfortable with arguing with the boss, it reflects confidence in one’s business and domain knowledge if nothing else. Of course, arguing has to be done in pragmatic and constructive ways. Arrogance is frequently frowned on. One should also use proper chain of command guidelines (e.g., disagreeing in private versus public). All said, I believe being able to argue with the boss, being able to take a position that may not be in agreement with the boss, etc. – these things mark the crossing of an important milestone in a professional career. Why? Because you have not only made yourself more valuable, but you’ve also made yourself more valuable to your boss. You are no longer part of the "yes man/woman" crowd. You become an interdependent thinker and can better serve the vision of the business.
So go pick a fight with your boss this Friday. Hey it will be a Friday, and he/she may be in a better mood for one thing.
However….
I have my own opinion being American, born and raised here in the United States…my ancestors were from Europe and I must say I have the utmost respect for my elders.
With that being mentioned, I have worked for many idian, nygerian, asian people, they all treat me as though I am their slave. The speak to me with disrespect and it is very difficult to not respond to them in a defensive manner.
I am starting to wonder if they truly realize what a privilege it is to be here in America. All my previous bosses in this nationality have promised me the world and week by week they take something more away from me, health insurance, time off, hours of work get less and less, spontaneous evaluations….which I feel like I am working in a SWEAT SHOP.
Arguing with my boss with most likely end when she fires me since there is nothing else left for her to take.
J,
Sounds like you have had some bad experiences. I have not had the misfortune of working for someone that treats me with (significant) disrespect, but that is a pretty untenable situation to be working in. If you are unable to clear the water through civil discussion, I would hope that you have the possibility to look elsewhere for work.